{"title":"The Slang Edit","description":null,"products":[{"product_id":"cucumber-dog-hard-pass-collegiate-sky-blue-hoodie","title":"Cucumber Dog Hard Pass Collegiate Sky Blue Hoodie","description":"\u003cp id=\"p-rc_355c321a2f021d12-74\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWelcome to the only club you actually want to join. This premium sky blue hoodie features the phrase 'HARD PASS' in bold, arched yellow collegiate lettering with a dark outline, proudly declaring your lifelong membership to the official 'CUCUMBER DOG AVOIDANCE SOCIETY' printed directly below\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003csup class=\"superscript\"\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c\/sup\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e. It is the perfect layer for declining invitations, avoiding eye contact in the supermarket, and unilaterally opting out of unnecessary social obligations.\u003c\/span\u003e \u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eMaterial Construction:\u003c\/b\u003e Crafted with a 100 per cent cotton face and a 65 per cent ring-spun cotton, 35 per cent polyester blend for maximum warmth.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eDesign Specifications:\u003c\/b\u003e Includes a front pouch pocket, matching flat drawstrings, a structured 3-panel hood, and a self-fabric patch on the back for a premium finish.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eShipping and Corporate Policy:\u003c\/b\u003e We currently offer fulfilment exclusively to the USA and Canada to streamline our operations, and we provide free shipping on all orders over $60. As our apparel is manufactured using a print on demand process, we strictly limit returns and exchanges to damaged or defective items. We absolutely do not accept returns for a change of mind. Please consult the size chart carefully before placing your order.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eColonial Translation\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eUK:\u003c\/b\u003e Humour \/ Cosy \/ Colours \/ Centre \/ Behaviour \/ Fulfilment\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eUS:\u003c\/b\u003e Humor \/ Cozy \/ Colors \/ Center \/ Behavior \/ Fulfillment\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDisclaimer: This hoodie runs small. For the perfect fit, we recommend ordering one size larger than your usual size.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"CUCUMBER DOG","offers":[{"title":"S","offer_id":55448286200150,"sku":"6539029_13917","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"M","offer_id":55448286232918,"sku":"6539029_13918","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"L","offer_id":55448286265686,"sku":"6539029_13919","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL","offer_id":55448286298454,"sku":"6539029_13920","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL","offer_id":55448286331222,"sku":"6539029_13921","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL","offer_id":55448286363990,"sku":"6539029_13922","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0955\/7793\/2118\/files\/unisex-premium-pullover-hoodie-sky-blue-front-6ab137b01bc0b.jpg?v=1789999036"},{"product_id":"cucumber-dog-vibe-check-collegiate-carbon-grey-hoodie","title":"Cucumber Dog Vibe Check Collegiate Carbon Grey Hoodie","description":"\u003cp id=\"p-rc_79ebbab52d79d62f-78\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eAssume the role of an official auditor of social situations. This premium carbon grey hoodie features the phrase 'VIBE CHECK' in bold, arched navy collegiate typography with a 3D cream drop shadow\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003csup class=\"superscript\"\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c\/sup\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e. Directly below, it establishes your absolute authority with 'CUCUMBER DOG INSPECTION DEPT.' and a cream line art portrait of our Chief Judgement Officer, Sir Cucumber Dog, wearing his signature suit and monocle\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003csup class=\"superscript\"\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c\/sup\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e. Applied using advanced DTF (Direct to Film) printing technology, the graphic delivers exceptional durability and crisp detailing that will easily outlast your patience for other people. It is the ideal uniform for silently auditing a room and inevitably finding everyone lacking.\u003c\/span\u003e \u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eMaterial Construction:\u003c\/b\u003e Crafted with a 100 per cent cotton face and a 65 per cent ring-spun cotton, 35 per cent polyester blend for maximum warmth.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eDesign Specifications:\u003c\/b\u003e Includes a front pouch pocket, matching flat drawstrings, a structured 3-panel hood, and a self-fabric patch on the back for a premium finish.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eShipping and Corporate Policy:\u003c\/b\u003e We currently offer fulfilment exclusively to the USA and Canada to streamline our operations, and we provide free shipping on all orders over $60. As our apparel is manufactured using a print on demand process, we strictly limit returns and exchanges to damaged or defective items. We absolutely do not accept returns for a change of mind. Please consult the size chart carefully before placing your order.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eColonial Translation\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eUK:\u003c\/b\u003e Humour \/ Cosy \/ Colours \/ Centre \/ Behaviour \/ Fulfilment \/ Judgement\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eUS:\u003c\/b\u003e Humor \/ Cozy \/ Colors \/ Center \/ Behavior \/ Fulfillment \/ Judgment\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDisclaimer: This hoodie runs small. For the perfect fit, we recommend ordering one size larger than your usual size.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Cucumber Dog | Sarcastic Mugs \u0026 Offensive British Gifts","offers":[{"title":"S","offer_id":55448332697942,"sku":"4925965_10784","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"M","offer_id":55448332730710,"sku":"4925965_10785","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"L","offer_id":55448332763478,"sku":"4925965_10786","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL","offer_id":55448332796246,"sku":"4925965_10787","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL","offer_id":55448332829014,"sku":"4925965_10788","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL","offer_id":55448332861782,"sku":"4925965_13420","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0955\/7793\/2118\/files\/unisex-premium-pullover-hoodie-carbon-grey-front-6ab138513da9e.jpg?v=1789999202"},{"product_id":"cucumber-dog-free-rent-navy-hoodie","title":"Cucumber Dog Free Rent Navy Hoodie","description":"\u003cp id=\"p-rc_31a1290575c61be3-80\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eEvict your enemies from your thoughts, but ensure you remain permanently in theirs. This premium navy hoodie features the phrase 'FREE RENT' in bold, arched orange collegiate lettering with a cream outline, positioned prominently above 'CUCUMBER DOG REAL ESTATE' in matching cream typography\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003csup class=\"superscript\"\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c\/sup\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e. Applied using advanced DTF (Direct to Film) printing technology, the graphic delivers exceptional durability, crisp edges, and vibrant colour that will survive endless cycles in the washing machine. It is the perfect varsity style layer for reminding everyone exactly who occupies the premium real estate in their minds.\u003c\/span\u003e \u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eMaterial Construction:\u003c\/b\u003e Crafted with a 100 per cent cotton face and a 65 per cent ring-spun cotton, 35 per cent polyester blend for maximum warmth.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eDesign Specifications:\u003c\/b\u003e Includes a front pouch pocket, matching flat drawstrings, a structured 3-panel hood, and a self-fabric patch on the back for a premium finish.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eShipping and Corporate Policy:\u003c\/b\u003e We currently offer fulfilment exclusively to the USA and Canada to streamline our operations, and we provide free shipping on all orders over $60. As our apparel is manufactured using a print on demand process, we strictly limit returns and exchanges to damaged or defective items. We absolutely do not accept returns for a change of mind. Please consult the size chart carefully before placing your order.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eColonial Translation\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eUK:\u003c\/b\u003e Humour \/ Cosy \/ Colours \/ Centre \/ Behaviour \/ Fulfilment \/ Colour\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eUS:\u003c\/b\u003e Humor \/ Cozy \/ Colors \/ Center \/ Behavior \/ Fulfillment \/ Color\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eThe 20-Word Hook\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDisclaimer: This hoodie runs small. For the perfect fit, we recommend ordering one size larger than your usual size.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"CUCUMBER DOG","offers":[{"title":"S","offer_id":55449217597782,"sku":"3784564_11491","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"M","offer_id":55449217630550,"sku":"3784564_11492","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"L","offer_id":55449217663318,"sku":"3784564_11493","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL","offer_id":55449217696086,"sku":"3784564_11494","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL","offer_id":55449217728854,"sku":"3784564_11495","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL","offer_id":55449217761622,"sku":"3784564_13417","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0955\/7793\/2118\/files\/unisex-premium-pullover-hoodie-navy-blazer-front-6ab13fa58b22b.jpg?v=1790001077"},{"product_id":"nope-nope-collegiate-forest-green-hoodie","title":"Cucumber Dog Nope \u0026 Nope Collegiate Forest Green Hoodie","description":"\u003cp id=\"p-rc_f639836851857772-82\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDouble down on your refusal to participate. This premium forest green hoodie features the phrase 'NOPE \u0026amp; NOPE' in bold, arched white collegiate lettering with a dark green outline, proudly announcing your induction into the official 'CUCUMBER DOG NEVER HAPPENING CLUB' printed directly below\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003csup class=\"superscript\"\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c\/sup\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e. Applied using advanced DTF (Direct to Film) printing technology, the graphic delivers exceptional durability, crisp edges, and vibrant colour that will survive endless cycles in the washing machine. It is the ultimate varsity style layer for shutting down terrible ideas, declining social events, and reinforcing your absolute lack of enthusiasm.\u003c\/span\u003e \u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eMaterial Construction:\u003c\/b\u003e Crafted with a 100 per cent cotton face and a 65 per cent ring-spun cotton, 35 per cent polyester blend for maximum warmth.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eDesign Specifications:\u003c\/b\u003e Includes a front pouch pocket, matching flat drawstrings, a structured 3-panel hood, and a self-fabric patch on the back for a premium finish.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eShipping and Corporate Policy:\u003c\/b\u003e We currently offer fulfilment exclusively to the USA and Canada to streamline our operations, and we provide free shipping on all orders over $60. As our apparel is manufactured using a print on demand process, we strictly limit returns and exchanges to damaged or defective items. We absolutely do not accept returns for a change of mind. Please consult the size chart carefully before placing your order.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eColonial Translation\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eUK:\u003c\/b\u003e Humour \/ Cosy \/ Colours \/ Centre \/ Behaviour \/ Fulfilment \/ Colour\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eUS:\u003c\/b\u003e Humor \/ Cozy \/ Colors \/ Center \/ Behavior \/ Fulfillment \/ Color\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDisclaimer: This hoodie runs small. For the perfect fit, we recommend ordering one size larger than your usual size.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Cucumber Dog | Sarcastic Mugs \u0026 Offensive British Gifts","offers":[{"title":"S","offer_id":55449307283798,"sku":"6262372_16162","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"M","offer_id":55449307316566,"sku":"6262372_16163","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"L","offer_id":55449307349334,"sku":"6262372_16164","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL","offer_id":55449307382102,"sku":"6262372_16165","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL","offer_id":55449307414870,"sku":"6262372_16166","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL","offer_id":55449307447638,"sku":"6262372_16167","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0955\/7793\/2118\/files\/unisex-premium-pullover-hoodie-forest-green-front-6ab1404b55fd3.jpg?v=1790001247"},{"product_id":"cucumber-dog-slay-athletics-collegiate-gold-hoodie","title":"Cucumber Dog Slay Athletics Collegiate Gold Hoodie","description":"\u003cp id=\"p-rc_f18602dbda9285c6-96\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eChannel your complete lack of physical exertion into aggressive varsity aesthetics. This premium gold hoodie features the word 'SLAY' in large, solid black collegiate typography with a crisp cream outline, positioned directly above 'CUCUMBER DOG ATHLETICS' in matching cream text\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003csup class=\"superscript\"\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c\/sup\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e. While the youth of today use the term to describe exceptional performance, flawless execution, or looking incredible, we prefer to apply it strictly to our ability to sleep for twelve consecutive hours.\u003c\/span\u003e \u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eApplied using advanced DTF (Direct to Film) printing technology, the graphic delivers exceptional durability, crisp edges, and vibrant colour that will survive endless cycles in the washing machine. It is the perfect layer for claiming an athletic victory over your daily task list, or simply \"slaying\" a profound state of doing absolutely nothing on the sofa.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eMaterial Construction:\u003c\/b\u003e Crafted with a 100 per cent cotton face and a 65 per cent ring-spun cotton, 35 per cent polyester blend for maximum warmth.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eDesign Specifications:\u003c\/b\u003e Includes a front pouch pocket, matching flat drawstrings, a structured 3-panel hood, and a self-fabric patch on the back for a premium finish.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eShipping and Corporate Policy:\u003c\/b\u003e We currently offer fulfilment exclusively to the USA and Canada to streamline our operations, and we provide free shipping on all orders over $60. As our apparel is manufactured using a print on demand process, we strictly limit returns and exchanges to damaged or defective items. We absolutely do not accept returns for a change of mind. Please consult the size chart carefully before placing your order.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eColonial Translation\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eUK:\u003c\/b\u003e Humour \/ Cosy \/ Colours \/ Centre \/ Behaviour \/ Fulfilment \/ Colour\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eUS:\u003c\/b\u003e Humor \/ Cozy \/ Colors \/ Center \/ Behavior \/ Fulfillment \/ Color\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e• Blank product sourced from Pakistan\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDisclaimer: This hoodie runs small. For the perfect fit, we recommend ordering one size larger than your usual size.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"CUCUMBER DOG","offers":[{"title":"S","offer_id":55449366856022,"sku":"9128157_24999","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":false},{"title":"M","offer_id":55449366888790,"sku":"9128157_25000","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":false},{"title":"L","offer_id":55449366921558,"sku":"9128157_25001","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":false},{"title":"XL","offer_id":55449366954326,"sku":"9128157_25002","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":false},{"title":"2XL","offer_id":55449366987094,"sku":"9128157_25003","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":false},{"title":"3XL","offer_id":55449367019862,"sku":"9128157_25004","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0955\/7793\/2118\/files\/unisex-premium-pullover-hoodie-team-gold-front-6ab148fd5af8b.jpg?v=1790003461"},{"product_id":"cucumber-dog-situationship-collegiate-bone-hoodie","title":"Cucumber Dog Situationship Collegiate Bone Hoodie","description":"\u003cp id=\"p-rc_756073f562670354-57\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWear your romantic ambiguity like a badge of dishonour. This premium bone hoodie features the word 'SITUATIONSHIP' in large, hollow dark red collegiate typography with a crisp outline, positioned directly above 'CUCUMBER DOG COUNSELLING CENTRE' in matching dark red\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003csup class=\"superscript\"\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c\/sup\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e. Applied using advanced DTF (Direct to Film) printing technology, the graphic delivers exceptional durability, crisp edges, and vibrant colour that will survive endless cycles in the washing machine. It is the perfect layer for analysing mixed signals, actively ignoring red flags, and avoiding the \"what are we\" conversation entirely.\u003c\/span\u003e \u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c!----\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eMaterial Construction:\u003c\/b\u003e Crafted with a 100 per cent cotton face and a 65 per cent ring-spun cotton, 35 per cent polyester blend for maximum warmth.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eDesign Specifications:\u003c\/b\u003e Includes a front pouch pocket, matching flat drawstrings, a structured 3-panel hood, and a self-fabric patch on the back for a premium finish.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eShipping and Corporate Policy:\u003c\/b\u003e We currently offer fulfilment exclusively to the USA and Canada to streamline our operations, and we provide free shipping on all orders over $60. As our apparel is manufactured using a print on demand process, we strictly limit returns and exchanges to damaged or defective items. We absolutely do not accept returns for a change of mind. Please consult the size chart carefully before placing your order.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eColonial Translation\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eUK:\u003c\/b\u003e Humour \/ Cosy \/ Colours \/ Centre \/ Behaviour \/ Fulfilment \/ Colour \/ Counselling \/ Dishonour\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eUS:\u003c\/b\u003e Humor \/ Cozy \/ Colors \/ Center \/ Behavior \/ Fulfillment \/ Color \/ Counseling \/ Dishonor\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDisclaimer: This hoodie runs small. For the perfect fit, we recommend ordering one size larger than your usual size.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"CUCUMBER DOG","offers":[{"title":"S","offer_id":55449432981846,"sku":"3141439_20284","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"M","offer_id":55449433014614,"sku":"3141439_20285","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"L","offer_id":55449433047382,"sku":"3141439_20286","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL","offer_id":55449433080150,"sku":"3141439_20287","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL","offer_id":55449433112918,"sku":"3141439_20288","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL","offer_id":55449433145686,"sku":"3141439_20289","price":39.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0955\/7793\/2118\/files\/unisex-premium-pullover-hoodie-bone-front-6ab141b0da038.jpg?v=1790001597"}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0955\/7793\/2118\/collections\/unisex-premium-pullover-hoodie-forest-green-front-6ab1404b554e6.jpg?v=1790090923","url":"https:\/\/cucumberdog.com\/collections\/the-slang-edit.oembed","provider":"Cucumber Dog | Sarcastic Mugs \u0026 Offensive British Gifts","version":"1.0","type":"link"}