{"product_id":"cucumber-dog-rudest-customer-servic-hoodie","title":"Cucumber Dog Respectfully No Graffiti Black Hoodie","description":"\u003cp\u003eSome brands strive for excellence; we actively engineer profound disappointment. This premium white hoodie features our bold 'CD' logo alongside the proud declaration: \"CUCUMBER DOG. (VOTED RUDEST CUSTOMER SERVICE).\" Printed in our official Cucumber Green, this design is a masterclass in managing public expectations. It instantly informs everyone in your immediate vicinity that you have absolutely zero interest in assisting them, answering their questions, or validating their existence.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eMaterial Construction:\u003c\/b\u003e Crafted with a 100 per cent cotton face and a 65 per cent ring-spun cotton, 35 per cent polyester blend for maximum warmth.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eDesign Specifications:\u003c\/b\u003e Includes a front pouch pocket, matching flat drawstrings, a structured 3-panel hood, and a self-fabric patch on the back for a premium finish.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eCorporate Policy:\u003c\/b\u003e As our apparel is manufactured using a print on demand fulfillment process, we strictly limit returns and exchanges to damaged or defective items. We absolutely do not accept returns for a change of mind. Please consult the size chart carefully before placing your order.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eColonial Translation\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eUK:\u003c\/b\u003e Humour \/ Cosy \/ Colours \/ Centre \/ Behaviour \/ Favour\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eUS:\u003c\/b\u003e Humor \/ Cozy \/ Colors \/ Center \/ Behavior \/ Favor\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDisclaimer: This hoodie runs small. For the perfect fit, we recommend ordering one size larger than your usual size.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Cucumber Dog | Sarcastic Mugs \u0026 Offensive British Gifts","offers":[{"title":"S","offer_id":55379372638550,"sku":"8055978_10774","price":77.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M","offer_id":55379372671318,"sku":"8055978_10775","price":77.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L","offer_id":55379372704086,"sku":"8055978_10776","price":77.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL","offer_id":55379372736854,"sku":"8055978_10777","price":77.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL","offer_id":55379372769622,"sku":"8055978_10778","price":77.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0955\/7793\/2118\/files\/unisex-premium-pullover-hoodie-white-back-6aa900b02e0b1.jpg?v=1789460674","url":"https:\/\/cucumberdog.com\/products\/cucumber-dog-rudest-customer-servic-hoodie","provider":"Cucumber Dog | Sarcastic Mugs \u0026 Offensive British Gifts","version":"1.0","type":"link"}