{"product_id":"morning-negotiations-sarcastic-coffee-mug","title":"Morning Negotiations Sarcastic Coffee Mug","description":"\u003ch2 style=\"font-size: 1.15rem; font-weight: 700; margin: 0 0 0.75rem 0; color: #111111;\"\u003eThe Ultimate Dawn Defence Mechanism\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eEarly mornings are an uncalled-for act of corporate aggression. The \u003cstrong\u003eMorning Negotiations Sarcastic Coffee Mug\u003c\/strong\u003e captures the exact moment diplomatic relations with your alarm clock break down completely. Featuring our Chief Judgement Officer in his signature cucumber-print pyjamas, nightcap, and cucumber-slice monocle taking a wooden mallet to a ringing clock, this vessel makes it abundantly clear that you are not accepting questions before noon.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2 style=\"font-size: 1.15rem; font-weight: 700; margin: 1.5rem 0 0.75rem 0; color: #111111;\"\u003eTechnical Specification and Vessel Anatomy\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eWhat it is:\u003c\/strong\u003e A heavy-duty, glossy white ceramic mug available in 11 oz, 15 oz, and 20 oz capacities, engineered with a high-contrast comic graphic that withstands both dishwasher cycles and microwave reheating.\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eWhere it is made:\u003c\/strong\u003e Conceptualised with pure deadpan animosity in Southampton, England, and printed and dispatched exclusively within the United States and Canada for rapid North American delivery.\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eWhen to deploy it:\u003c\/strong\u003e At 7:00 AM when your willpower is at zero, during unscheduled morning video calls, or whilst staring blankly at a spreadsheet wondering who authorised this meeting.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2 style=\"font-size: 1.15rem; font-weight: 700; margin: 1.5rem 0 0.75rem 0; color: #111111;\"\u003eColonial Translation (For Our North American Cousins)\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBritish English:\u003c\/strong\u003e Pyjamas \/ Unauthorised \/ Colour \/ Catalogue\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAmerican English:\u003c\/strong\u003e Pajamas \/ Unauthorized \/ Color \/ Catalog\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Cucumber Dog | Rude Mugs, Funny Tees \u0026 Elite Disdain","offers":[{"title":"11 oz","offer_id":56403722469718,"sku":"1921097_1320","price":25.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"15 oz","offer_id":56403722502486,"sku":"1921097_4830","price":37.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"20 oz","offer_id":56403722535254,"sku":"1921097_16586","price":41.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0955\/7793\/2118\/files\/white-glossy-mug-white-11-oz-handle-on-right-6ae48bba57703.jpg?v=1793362882","url":"https:\/\/cucumberdog.com\/products\/morning-negotiations-sarcastic-coffee-mug","provider":"Cucumber Dog | Sarcastic Apparel, Athletic wear \u0026 Homeware","version":"1.0","type":"link"}