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Elevate your outfit with the men’s premium heavyweight tee. The tee has a structured, classy fit and is both durable and soft thanks to its ring-spun cotton material. Layer the t-shirt or wear it on its own and enjoy great looks with little effort!
• 100% combed ring-spun cotton
• Charcoal Heather and Carbon Grey is 60% cotton and 40% polyester
• Fabric weight: 6.5 oz/yd² (220 g/m²)
• 20 singles
• Regular fit
• Side-seamed construction
• 1 × 1 rib at collar
• Single-needle edge stitch 7/8″
• Blank product sourced from Bangladesh
Respectfully No Heavyweight Graphic T-Shirt
$58.00
Estimated delivery:
🚚 Sir Cucumber Dog pays for shipping. UK & US delivery is on us! Each order is fulfilled in the country of order.
• 100% combed ring-spun cotton
• Charcoal Heather and Carbon Grey is 60% cotton and 40% polyester
• Fabric weight: 6.5 oz/yd² (220 g/m²)
• 20 singles
• Regular fit
• Side-seamed construction
• 1 × 1 rib at collar
• Single-needle edge stitch 7/8″
• Blank product sourced from Bangladesh
Size guide
| WIDTH (inches) | LENGTH (inches) | |
| S | 18 | 29 ½ |
| M | 20 | 30 ½ |
| L | 22 | 31 ½ |
| XL | 24 | 32 ½ |
| 2XL | 26 | 33 ½ |
| 3XL | 28 | 34 ½ |
| 4XL | 30 | 35 ½ |
| WIDTH (cm) | LENGTH (cm) | |
| S | 45.7 | 75 |
| M | 50.8 | 77.5 |
| L | 55.9 | 80 |
| XL | 61 | 82.6 |
| 2XL | 66 | 85 |
| 3XL | 71.1 | 87.6 |
| 4XL | 76.2 | 90.2 |
Shipping & Returns
Return policy
The Official Grievance Policy
Our primary objective is for you to be entirely satisfied with your apparel so that neither of us has to deal with extra paperwork. However, if your purchase has failed to meet your exceptionally high standards—or if we have somehow made a genuine error—please inform us immediately.
We will deploy our best administrative efforts to investigate the issue and make it right. Do not suffer in silence; complain to us directly so we can resolve the problem with maximum efficiency and minimum fuss.
- To initiate a return or report an issue, please contact our support team with your order number.
Frequently asked questions
How do I choose the correct size?
Do not guess your measurements. Our premium apparel uses standard unisex sizing, but assuming you know your exact fit is a terrible strategy. Because our inventory is strictly printed on demand, we absolutely do not accept returns or process refunds if you simply order the wrong size or change your mind. Returns and exchanges are reserved solely for genuinely damaged or defective goods.
Please consult the highly accurate size guide located on this specific product page before adding the item to your basket. Taking two minutes to measure a garment you already own is the most effective way to ensure a proper fit and avoid looking like a burst sausage.
| Size | Body Length (inches) | Chest Width (inches) | Sleeve Length (inches) |
|---|---|---|---|
| S | 27 ⅛ | 19 ½ | 8 ⅞ |
| M | 28 ¾ | 21 | 9 ½ |
| L | 29 ½ | 22 ¼ | 9 ⅝ |
| XL | 30 ¼ | 23 ⅜ | 9 ⅞ |
| 2XL | 31 ⅛ | 25.00 | 10 |
| 3XL | 31 ⅞ | 26 ⅝ | 10 ¼ |
| 4XL | 32 ⅝ | 28 ½ | 10 ¼ |
| 5XL | 33 ⅛ | 30 ½ | 10 ¼ |
How long does delivery take?
very piece of apparel or sarcastic accessory is custom made to order. This print on demand approach means production takes between 2 to 5 business days. Once printed, the package goes out with a tracking link. Standard shipping is calculated at checkout, with free shipping automatically unlocked on orders over $60.
What is your return policy?
As every single item is a bespoke masterpiece printed to order, we do not accept returns or exchanges for a sudden change of heart or incorrect sizing. However, if your item arrives misprinted, faulty, or damaged by the courier, please contact our support team immediately with a clear photograph so we can resolve the issue.
How do I wash and care for this item?
Treat your new goods with the respect they deserve. Wash our organic cotton t-shirts inside out on a cool wash (30 degrees Celsius) and allow them to air dry to maintain their shape. Standard ceramic mugs are entirely dishwasher safe, but our heat colour changing mugs are delicate divas that must be washed by hand.
Who is Sir Cucumber Dog?
A gentleman does not typically reveal his secrets, but for you, I will make an exception. I am Sir Cucumber Dog: a plush pug of unparalleled sophistication, permanently squeezed into a bespoke green cucumber print suit. The cucumber monocle is purely for judging your life choices, and the yellow bow tie is because I am not a savage.
As the Chairman of this establishment, I oversee a curated collection of rude and funny designs across mugs, tees, and coasters, all presented in our signature Cucumber green and Cucumber cream. I am the physical embodiment of a lifestyle that prioritises sharp tailoring, strong gin, and an overwhelming disdain for the general public.