Do You Know Who I Amn't?" T-Shirt | Mind Games Collection
Black / S
£19.99
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Do You Know Who I Amn't?" T-Shirt | Mind Games Collection
£19.99
We print everything to order—because we hate waste and dusty stock. Due to this highly customised effort, delivery takes 4–8 days (yes, you have to wait). If you’re lucky, it’s 2–5. We’ll send a dispatch email when your stuff is finally on its way.
You know the type. The person who demands attention with a self-important "Do you know who I am?". This T-shirt is the perfect, delightfully confusing antidote for the existentially anonymous. It is a wearable mental short-circuit that forces everyone who reads it to pause, reboot their brain, and wonder if they have forgotten how to speak the Queen's English.
Part of our Mind Games Collection, this tee takes a classic bit of arrogance and turns it into a magnificent, grammatically questionable puzzle. It is for the chronic overthinkers, the agents of chaos, and anyone who enjoys watching people try to figure out if "amn't" is actually a word. Hint: it is in the best parts of the world.
With the Cucumber Dog brand mark sitting quietly beneath, you have the full backing of a pug who knows exactly who he isn't. Wear it to the pub, to a meeting that should have been an email, or just while staring into the abyss.
Why This Shirt is a Stroke of Genius (or a crisis):
The Ultimate Ego-Killer: A direct hit to anyone taking themselves too seriously.
Grammatical Chaos: Using "amn't" is a power move that simply cannot be ignored.
Royal Mail, On The House: Dispatched with Free UK Shipping, arriving whenever the universe decides you exist.
Comfort for the Existentially Dreadful: Made from soft, sturdy cotton, ideal for questioning your place in the cosmos.
The Fiddly Bits (Specs):
Fabric Composition:
Solid colours are 100% cotton.
Sport Grey is 90% cotton, 10% polyester.
Ash Grey is 99% cotton, 1% polyester.
Heather colours are a 50/50 cotton/polyester blend of pure, unadulterated nonsense.
Fabric Weight: A solid 5.0–5.3 oz/yd² (170-180 g/m²).
Construction: Made with open-end yarn and tubular fabric, with a taped neck and shoulders. Plus double seams at the sleeves and bottom hem to survive any questionable life choices.
Sourced From: Our blank tees are sourced from various corners of the world (Honduras, Nicaragua, Haiti, Dominican Republic, Bangladesh, Mexico).
A Note On Your Order (Printed in its own time): This shirt is not just sitting in a warehouse. Each one is printed fresh just for you the moment you place your order. This on-demand wizardry means it takes a little longer to arrive, but it is brilliant for cutting down on waste. You cannot rush a masterpiece of mental manipulation.
Heads-Up (Disclaimers):
The White tee is more of an 'off-white'.
The Natural colour has dark speckles in it: it is a feature, not a flaw.
This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!
Size guide
| LENGTH (inches) | WIDTH (inches) | SLEEVE LENGTH (inches) | |
| S | 28 | 18 | 15 ⅝ |
| M | 29 | 20 | 17 |
| L | 30 | 22 | 18 ½ |
| XL | 31 | 24 | 20 |
| 2XL | 32 | 26 | 21 ½ |
| 3XL | 33 | 28 | 22 ¾ |
| LENGTH (cm) | WIDTH (cm) | SLEEVE LENGTH (cm) | |
| S | 71.1 | 45.7 | 39.7 |
| M | 73.7 | 50.8 | 43.2 |
| L | 76.2 | 55.9 | 47 |
| XL | 78.7 | 61 | 50.8 |
| 2XL | 81.3 | 66 | 54.6 |
| 3XL | 83.8 | 71.1 | 58 |
Every brilliant mug, tee, or coaster you order is made especially for you using print-on-demand. This custom process is personally overseen by our mascot, Sir Cucumber Dog, who ensures his cucumber monocle is positioned just right for the official 'Pug of Approval' stamp. Because we don't hold stock and craft everything bespoke, your order takes a little longer to arrive than rushed, mass-produced items. But this extra time guarantees a high-quality, perfectly rude, and funny product made just for you!
